When chatting with friends who have chosen not to have children right now, I can’t help but feel that I’m somehow making motherhood sound awful. I’m not doing this on purpose of course, I just think that in many ways being a parent looks dreadfully challenging from the outside, and at times it really is.
I can see looks of sympathy when I mention having to get home early because my little guy wakes up at 5:30 am. My conversations now centre around days spent running after a toddler who only sits down to eat or sleep! I can tell they think I look exhausted (which let’s be real I am, but at least I am functioning). I get the sense that parenting seems like a prison sentence to them when they see me trying to change a poop filled diaper while he actively runs away from me.
I Must Not Be Explaining It Right
No matter what I say or how much I try to defend parenthood, the message never seems to get across. Waking up at 5:30 to run after a small child for hours on end without any “me” time (except when they are napping) does sound kind of awful..Before having kids I remember imagining what a nightmare tending to a child day and night would be.
Before Gibson I remember watching my friends with children sympathetically, thinking how it looks like so much work being responsible for a tiny human being all the time. Sometimes I would hope for a “relaxing hang out” without the kids or wondered if they’d have more fun to leave the baby at home if they could. I can’t believe how much things have changed.
Oh, How Things Have Changed
I am now that mom who brings her son everywhere – sometimes out of necessity and sometimes out of enjoyment. I am proud of that tiny little human that calls me mom and I am excited for the people I love to get to see what an awesome little person he is growing into.
I am not pretending that sometimes it isn’t a pain in the ass to bring him . When I am hanging out with my girlfriends it would be easier to be baby free, but I love when they get to see him laugh or dance. It brings me immense joy when he adorably waves to them goodbye and blows them a kiss or runs up to give them a hug. It is in those moments that I am just so overwhelmed with love…
You forget that you woke up at 530 am.
You forget that 10 minutes ago he had the most disgusting poop filled diaper and stuck his hand in it.
You forget that you haven’t been able to pee by yourself in a week.
…Because it all just feels worth it.
The Cliche’s are True
It’s difficult to put into words what parenthood feels like or how the hard days and long ass nights of being a parent are so fulfilling (sometimes lol). I find that no matter how hard I try or what words I use to explain it, it all comes out sounding like a cliche. I can see others smile and nod their head in agreement but shaking their heads in disagreement as soon as I’m gone. And before being a mom I was right there with them.
Of course there are times where being a parent has its challenges but more often than not it’s the best thing I have ever done (yes I know that is a cliche). So I think that I’ll stop trying to convince people and let them figure it out for themselves. It’s been working pretty good so far.
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