Worrying about the well being of my vagina, was just one of the many things that gave me Mommy Guilt while I was pregnant.
From the moment I found out I was pregnant everything changed. Seeing the positive pregnancy test meant I was no longer responsible solely for myself, I was now also responsible for the tiny human growing inside of me.
Immediately I began thinking about all of the things that I would have to adjust now that I was pregnant. I knew there was no drinking alcohol, no more hot yoga and no hot tubs. However as my pregnancy continued I realized that there were a lot more things that I needed to be careful about, and this is where the first instalment of my Mommy Guilt would begin.
So here are the top 7 things that gave this Doula “Mommy Guilt” while I was pregnant.
7. Eating Sushi.
I know you’re not supposed to eat sushi while pregnant, but in a cruel twist of fate I craved sushi like nobody’s business. So from time to time I would eat it at my favourite sushi place in Sudbury, Osaka Sushi. Nothing raw of course, but immediately following the deliciousness I would feel super guilty about it.
6. Including Kraft Dinner as a staple to my diet.
I loved Kraft Dinner while pregnant. Yes I am aware that it is not the most nutritious choice and that it is packed full of calories, but that did not bother me too much. I ate Kraft Dinner to my little heart’s desire. Then of course felt gulity about not making healthier choices for my baby and I.
5. Sleeping on my back.
All I wanted to do was sleep on my back, and while I did my best not to do so, there were nights where I would just be so uncomfortable that I would say “Screw it” and slept on my back. Insert Guilt immediately.
4. Not working out.
Prior to pregnancy I was was very active, however the majority of my pregnancy was spent not doing a damn thing; and then of course feeling guilty about it.
3. Wishing I was having a girl because of the cute clothes.
Yes boy clothes can be adorable, and I have to admit that since Gibson arrived he has received A LOT of amazing little outfits. BUT they are not little dresses or tutus. They are not pink and frilly and oh so adorably feminine. So yes, at times during my pregnancy I wished I was having a girl for the clothes I could dress her in, and I felt like crap about it.
2. Being concerned about the well being of my vagina.
During pregnancy I was slightly concerned about the future condition of my vagina. I mean it seemed a little daunting to think about pushing a baby out of there and it still remaining in one piece. After doing some research I learned all about Perineal Massage and now as a Doula in Sudbury I know A LOT about things that can help get the vagina ready for birth. While I am grateul to know this now it did not reach me soon enough to rid myself of that guilty feeling of worrying about my vagina, rather than my baby on the way.
1. Knowing nothing about how to take care of a baby.
I did a ton of research on labour, birth and all things pregnancy (as I talk about here) but I realized shortly before my son arrived (seriously like 3 days before he arrived 2 weeks early) that I knew NOTHING about what to do when he actually got here. I remember thinking “Wow I am an awful mom, I don’t know a damn thing about what to do when the baby gets here.”
Of course everything turned out fine, and BY NO MEANS AM I RECOMMENDING DOING ANY OR ALL OF THESE THINGS. However, if you have done some of these things cut yourself a little slack mama. You are growing and taking care of a tiny human and that is some hard freaking work.
So try to learn from this mama’s mistakes and try to give yourself a break from the Mommy Guilt, you are doing a great job!
What things give you Mommy Guilt during pregnancy or when the baby arrived!?