Three weeks ago I wrote a Blissful Bump update, excitedly sharing how good I have been feeling with this pregnancy and how grateful I am that things have been going smoothly. Within an hour of writing that blog I received a phone call from my midwife saying she needed to talk to Max and I about our most recent ultrasound. Suddenly that smooth and complication-free pregnancy was about to take a unwelcome turn and that blog was never published.
Our midwife explained that the ultrasound had shown that the baby had an “echogenic bowel”. She told us that it was hopefully nothing to worry about, however sometimes it is a soft marker of a possible abnormality with baby (such as an infection, malformation, cystic fibrosis or chromosomal abnormalities etc.). She then provided us with our options and we chose to make an appointment at Mount Sinai in Toronto for a level 2 ultrasound to have it checked out more thoroughly.
The Waiting Game
Our appointment was scheduled for Sept 23 (over two weeks from when we first heard the results) and the waiting period was awful. The last three weeks were stressful, and hard to balance hope at the same time as trying to prepare myself for troubling news. I bounced back and forth between believing everything would be fine to being overwhelmed with panic that something could be terribly wrong.
The first couple of days I spent googling information to try and calm my anxieties, but of course that didn’t work. Then I spent time trying not to think about it and pretending it was no big deal, followed by days filled with absolute panic. Then, thank goodness, the day of our appointment arrived.
When we went in for the ultrasound we had been of the understanding that afterwards we would have the opportunity to discuss the results with a Doctor. Instead, they simply called us up and said “you can go home.” I was so confused, my eyes started welling up and asked “So does that mean everything is okay? Baby is good?” She once again smiled, nodded and said “You can go home.” Max and I didn’t really fully understand if the results were good or if there was just no imminent danger and the report to our midwife would notify us when/if follow-up was required.
However I am happy to report that our ultrasound from Mount Sinai came back all good! There was no sign of an echogenic bowel, no abnormalities were found and baby is growing right on point! We are clearly over the moon happy about the results and so beyond grateful that baby is happy and healthy in my belly.
The past few weeks were very difficult for us and while I am so very grateful that everything is okay, it gave me a new perspective for parents who may be experiencing a “high risk” pregnancy or who have complications with themselves or their babies. It was certainly a new kind of worry and one that impacted me greatly. Going through a scare myself has given me a deeper insight to how terrifying/challenging a pregnancy complication can be and just how important the right support is.
The amount of love and support that we needed/received during this time made me even more confident with my choice of not only my Midwife, but also my Doula. Both of these women helped me immensely and made this process just a little less scary for us.
I am hoping that my next Blissful Bump update is much more ordinary (knock on wood).
Xoxo Meg, The Blissful Doula