Welcome back to The Blissful Doula Sudbury’s Series on Anxiety During Pregnancy!
For anyone who may have missed last weeks instalment of Anxiety During Pregnancy Part 1: The Entire First Trimester, you can find it here! You can also Subscribe to our page to get the most up to date Blogs straight to your inbox here!
Anxiety During Pregnancy: Being Intimate.
A common source of anxiety for couples during pregnancy is sex. There can be many questions surrounding what is safe and whether or not there is anything that should be avoided. As in in most things pregnancy related, the answers will be different for each couple.
If you are experiencing a low risk and healthy pregnancy, sex is generally encouraged. It is a great way to connect with your partner and it releases oxytocin (a “feel good” hormone), both of which are very beneficial during pregnancy.
However there are some circumstances where you may be advised by your health care provider to abstain from sex (either all forms or just intercourse). If this is the case, please keep in mind that there are ways to feel intimate besides sex, and maintaining a close connection with your partner is very important during pregnancy.
Today we discuss some of the most common anxieties couples feel about sex during their pregnancy.
We want to make sure that you have as many tools as possible to help with the Anxiety in your Pregnancy so we have created a FREE Download for Tips for Dealing with Anxiety During Pregnancy, and you can get your copy right here!
Will Sex Hurt the Baby?
This is the most common question I hear about sex during pregnancy. Parents are often concerned that penetration may harm the baby, and the good news is that your body is amazing and actually has a protective barrier called the Mucous Plug.
The mucous plug acts as a barrier to prevent anything from entering the cervix during pregnancy. The mucous plug is usually dislodged in the last days or weeks of pregnancy leading up to delivery. So as long as your mucous plug is intact then sex shouldn’t harm baby!
Can I have Sex in the First Trimester?
Last week we talked about all of the things that may cause Anxiety During the First Trimester (you can find that here) and while sex is generally considered safe during the first trimester there is a slight chance of some spotting.
“If your cervix – which is extremely sensitive at this stage of pregnancy – happens to get bumped by your partner’s penis a small amount of spotting may occur” (The Mother of All Pregnancy Books).
So if you are already a little anxious and the idea of having any spotting at all makes you really worried then waiting until the end of your first trimester may be helpful in keeping that anxiety level lower.
I want to have sex ALL the time, is that normal?
There are so many changes going on during pregnancy and an increased libido could be one of them. Many women find that an increased sex drive during pregnancy is a welcomed surprise, however for some women this change may cause some anxiety.
Some women who have experienced an increase in their libido during pregnancy refer to it like a “hunger”. The sexual satisfaction becomes a need that must be met, and if it is not they can get quite irritated. For some this significant increase in their sexual drive comes as quite a change from their usual norm, and so they are worried that something is wrong with them.
Increased sex drive is completely normal during pregnancy and if you are experiencing this know that there is nothing wrong with you, it may just be a symptom of your pregnancy.
I have no sex drive whatsoever, is there something wrong with me?
On the other end of the spectrum of sex drive during pregnancy is a decrease in libido.
Many women experience a decrease in their sex drive, and this may lead to some anxiety and concern about their connection with their partner.
Please know that feeling this way is totally OK! There are so many factors influencing how you feel during your pregnancy and with morning sickness, aches and pains, emotional highs and lows as well as hormonal fluctuations it is normal for your libido to take a dip.
It is important to keep the lines of communication open with your partner during pregnancy; so let them know how you are feeling and share what you are going through. Talking about what is happening is crucial in promoting a healthy relationship, especially during pregnancy.
When can I have sex after the baby is here?
The general recommendation is to wait 6 weeks postpartum to have sex. After 6 weeks any spotting or bleeding that may have occurred after birth is usually subsided and recovery is well underway.
However do not fret if you or your partner is not particularly interested in sex in those first few months after the baby has arrived. It is normal for it to take some time to get back into the swing of things after your little bundle of joy has arrived.
Talk about What is Making you Anxious!
I cannot stress this point enough. If there are things about sex during pregnancy that is making you anxious TALK ABOUT IT. Talk to your partner or your health care provider or your Doula! I am always here for support if you ever have questions or just want to share your feelings.
When you open up about things that may be causing your fear or worry, it can actually help in relieving some of the anxiety, which is so important for your overall wellness.
I hope you enjoyed Part 2 and, as always, I would love to hear about your own experiences. Did you have any anxiety about being intimate during pregnancy? Do you have any questions? There is no such thing as a silly question! Ask below in the comments or feel free to contact me!
Do you have any questions? There is no such thing as a silly question! Ask below in the comments or feel free to contact me!To find out more ways that I can support you during pregnancy, birth and postpartum click here.
Hope you have a great day.